So I'm going to share with y'all. :)
Let's just preface this by saying that Collette is very observant and very, very, very Gregarious. With a capital G. This little girl will talk with anyone, any time, anywhere, and feels free to make observations (loudly) about people/situations. All. The. Time. We have been working on this. When we go out somewere, I really must say about 50 times a day, "Talk quietly. Don't talk to everyone. Just talk quietly to Mommy. Make sure you use nice words." But sometimes we hit a snag. Take, for example the "F" word. No, not that "F" word. I'm referring to "fat." I have already discussed with Collette how we don't use that word about people because it hurts their feelings. She may call our chubby dog Bingo fat, or our pigs fat, but never people. Ok, no problem. So, one day we are out shopping and she sees two larger ladies. And says (loudly) "Mommy! Look at those really fatImeanbig people! They are big!" And of course I'm mortified. (Luckily I think the ladies were too far away to hear her). So I say, "We don't call people big either. That word can hurt people's feelings, too." Collette agrees. Then a few days later she tells a larger lady who is sitting down, "You have a big lap." Ok, she isn't technically disobeying me and calling someone big, but close enough. I clarify and say "You don't call any part of any person big. Got it?" Collette agrees again. And not a day later she is saying to someone, "You have big pants!" Really??? Sigh. So I was a smidgen nervous taking her to somewhere where she would likely see things she hasn't seen before.
So I know present to you, in Letterman Countdown Style,
My Top 5 Most Embarrassing Moments of our Mississippi Trip:
5.) While in line to board the plane, Collette notices a boy with a couple of stitches right on the bridge of his nose. She announces (loudly, of course. It's always loudly) "That boy has a spider on his nose!"
4.) When we got to the local library for story time, we discovered Miss Southern Heartland (a beauty pageant winner who will be in the Miss Mississippi pageant this summer) was there to read to the kids. Collette went right up to her, said hello, and then casually attempted to remove her crown and try it on her own head... luckily Miss Southern Heartland knows how to wield a bobby pin so that crown stayed put and didn't mess up her hair. Ha!
3.) In Wal-Mart, she notices a lady with pretty mirco braids. Not having a lot of cultural diversity in podunk PA, she says (again, loudly, in an awed voice) "Oooh Mommy! Look at her hair!" The lady laughs and stops to talk to us. She offers to let Collette touch her hair, which is right up Collette's alley. Then she touches Collette's hair. The two of them have a little hair-feeling session in the toothpaste isle of Wal-Mart while others look on, somewhat perplexed.
2.) As we are getting lined up to get off the plane, Collette drops her beloved baby doll. When she bends down to pick it up, she is right at eye-level with an impressive tattoo that spans the entire lower leg of the gentleman standing in front of us. She decides to just trace the design with her finger, since she's already down there. Have mercy. I yanked her up quickly and he just smiled at us and I said "She just dropped her doll!" with a big, don't-mind-us-my-daughter-wasn't-just-touching-your-tattoo smile.
1.) Waiting to board the plane for our flight home, a man, who I'm assuming is Hindu, sits down near us. Collette, of course, has to say hi immediately, and follows it up with, "You have a boo-boo on your forehead! How did you get that boo-boo?"
Y'all. There's no way to even recover from that one. I just said "I'm sorry." And wished I could crawl into a hole.
This child. What am I going to do with her? At least she's not lacking for personality! :)
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